Put your hand in my hand
by violettopaz
Summary: Hold your breath and count to ten. Feel the earth move and then hear my heart burst again


**Trigger warning, no cutting but similar behavior.**

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Kurt Hummel was not a wuss. The quite opposite actually, he was stronger than most people. But everyone had their flaws and fears - he was not an exception. It was the lack of control that made him clasp the armchair and squeeze his eyelids together. He wasn't claustrophobic but he couldn't stand knowing that he was unable to flee if danger would approach him. Couldn't do a single thing except wait.

He was sitting next to the window, thank god for that. They'd just finished boarding and the plane was on its way to the runway. Burt and Carole were sitting two rows behind him and Finn was already asleep in front of him. Since they had booked the tickets in the last minute there had only been two seats next to each other. Burt knew his son and had offered him a seat next to him but Kurt had turned him down and assured his father that he would do fine on his own. He would have felt more secure with Burt beside him but he wasn't a child anymore and he knew that he could handle his worries on his own. Besides, he was more comfortable keeping his anguish to himself.

He wished his body would offer him some sleep but that was only wishful thinking. Kurt envied Finn for that ability, he was far too uptight even though he knew just how secure flying was. It wasn't like this was his first time flying either - he'd done it a dozen times. Oddly enough his fear only seemed to increase in strength for each time.

The pilot announced that they were ready to leave the runway. Kurt loosed the tight grip on the armchair and pressed his nails into his palm instead. He knew this wasn't a healthy way of controlling his anguish but it helped. The angst turned into pain and he preferred physical pain at the moment. A pain he could control. He only used this method during flights and it was mostly during take-offs and landings. He forced himself to take a deep breath and chewed his now flavorless gum. The flight attendants were done with their safety check and the belt-sign shone red in front of him. The engine roared and he couldn't shut out the noise by listening to music since that was forbidden during the take-off. All he could do was wait for it to be over. When the plane began moving he shut his eyes again and pressed his nails violently against his palm. His toes curled up and he pressed his body down into the seat. He was so focused on the fear and the sound of the engine that he didn't catch the modest cough beside him. He hadn't even noticed anyone sitting at the seat next to him. It took two more attempts and finally a light brush against Kurt's arm to make him flinch and open his eyes. When he spun his head he came face to face with a curly-haired boy with brown eyes filled with worry.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to bother you but you seem so-… It will be alright, okay?", the other boy said. It was such a silly statement and it was the same thing Kurt had repeated in his head during twenty minutes. But he said it with a genuinely caring tone that made him forget were he were for a second. Then he remembered and didn't even blush from the embarrassment since he was too scared to care.

"I know, or I don't know since no one can know for sure but I know that the risk is minimal. It's just a weakness I guess, really hate flying.", Kurt rushed.

"It's okay, everyone has their weak spots. I just really hate that you have to do that", he said and pointed at his hand, "to keep the fear away". Kurt looked down and noticed moon-shaped cuts in his palm.

He was about to answer that it helped him switch focus from the noises and the idea of them crashing when the plane jolted as it lifted from the ground. In a second his nails were pressing down into his skin. But much to Kurt's surprise they were promptly exchanged by a warm hand. He could've swore his heart stopped for a beat when he found himself holding hands with a stranger. A beautiful stranger. He gave the boy a grateful smile and exhaled slowly. He couldn't help himself from tugging the boy's hand as the plane made its way up towards the sky. But the brown-eyed boy simply squeezed back to show his support. Kurt was surprised by how much this act of consideration affected him.

When the worst was over he turned to his neighbor and let out a small laugh. He didn't know what to say but blushed a bit when he looked down and saw their hands linked together.

"Thank you for that", was all he could come up with.

"No problem, I'm Blaine by the way", the boy, Blaine, answered with a broad smile

"I'm Kurt"

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**This is based on my own behavior, I did exactly the same thing last time I flew. I'm flying to Tenerife on Saturday and I'm just as scared as Kurt.**

**xxx**

_**violettopaz**_


End file.
